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Tuesday, April 10, 2007

No Sausage for Oil! (Or, you know, whatever else you want to yell at Paula Deen.)

I don't eat meat, and I'm always looking for an opportunity to be even more smug than usual, so I'm already standing in solidarity with the folks at Justice at Smithfield. Which, according to the email I just received, means heckling Food Network star Paula Deen next week when she comes to the Natural History museum:

Paula Deen is Cookin' for Smithfield in DC
We invite you to join us at 6:00 pm on April 18 at the National Museum of Natural History to greet Paula Deen who is currently on tour promoting her new book "It Ain't All About the Cooking." ..Paula Deen, famous for her southern buttery cooking, has partnered with Smithfield Foods in a marriage of mutual promotion...This partnership ignores the organizing efforts of over 5,500 Smithfield Packing workers in Tar Heel, N.C., where workers' injuries have gone up by 200% since 2003 and where workers are constantly enduring harsh working conditions characterized by fear, threats, abuse, and intimidation. How can Paula Deen who claims to put her "family values ahead of her cooking values" support a company which, according to a PBS Now documentary, "penalizes workers for taking care of their children and leaves amputated parents who can no longer keep their jobs and therefore are fired"? ...Because you support the struggle of Smithfield Tar Heel workers for decent working conditions, let's give Paula Deen a warm welcome during her visit...Lets ask Paula to do the right thing.

Now, I like Paula Deen. I respect any cook who refers to a recipe in which she rolls bananas in melted butter as "a healthy snack." And after years in the South, her show provides a nice trip down memory lane whenever she says something like "swait puhtatuh." But Deen should know that she's shilling for a company that treats its workers in such a shabby fashion. Also, I'm wondering why she is taking her book tour to the Natural History Museum. Seriously, is she going to be slapping together a batch of ham biscuits next to the Hope Diamond, or stewing up a crab boil underneath the elephant? Because when I think "Invertebrate Room" I don't think "tasty."


Blogger Hammer said...

Considering the striking chemical similarities between "primordial ooze" and Crisco, I don't if having the event there is really that much of a reach.

Fattening foods are just another one of the ways the man tries to keep you down. Or weighed down, as the case may be. And while I certainly support the struggles of the Southern proletariat, I'd be lying if I claimed to have never said, "Hey! Any of y'all want this last ham biscuit? No? Alright then, I'm taking it."

2:50 PM  
Blogger Twoste said...

Dude, not one week ago you said that you had Popeye's while staring at the Japanese flower trees. Something is not right in the state of Brunch-mark.
Also, I mean, who can eat eggs bendict WITHOUT bacon?!?! Not even Turkey bacon? And don't give me none of that soy crap either. We'll be having none of that!
Sure, I think about the animal though...when I'm stuffing it down my throat!! haha!
(kidding of course, I am fully respectful of your foibles and life).

3:53 PM  
Blogger Carrie M said...

okay, I just got grossed out by the giant squid in formaldehyde in a completely new way.

Although I will credit Ms Deen for the best darn French toast breakfast casserole known to man.

4:15 PM  
Anonymous etcetera said...

where's your blogroll?

and pass the scrapple, will ya?

4:59 PM  
Blogger inowpronounceyou said...

Paula I's her two sons tht drive me insane. She reminds me of the Southern version of my Northern grandmother. But those sons of hers? Grrr.

5:31 PM  
Anonymous kevin said...

I don't care how she cooks - her voice makes me want to shoot myself.

The Barefoot Contessa kicks Paula's ass any day of the week.

6:20 PM  
Blogger Brunch Bird said...

Hammer-Good point. I think that, given the Smithsonian's budget situation these days, most of the displays are being held together with Crisco anyway.

Twoste-Very observant, but I can allay your concerns. The Popeyes chicken was for him to consume while taking in the flora. The Popeyes mashed potatoes and beans were for me to consume while taking in the flora.
And I love soy meat. In fact last night I had a soy corndog. No. Joke.

CM-I'm totally looking for it on then. One of my primary thrills in life is French Toast casseroles.'

Etc-In trying to delete my Google ads (because I'm sick of shilling for The Man) I vaporized my blogroll. I think I'm leaving it off though anyway, you know, considering.
Even when I ate meat I wouldn't touch scrapple. It makes the hot dog look as pure as Evian.

I Now-Yeah, they seem like lunkheads. Although they certainly have a good scam going.

Kevin-You know that I just learned the other day that Ina Garten lived in DC for a long time and was a White House adviser on nuclear energy? How random is that?

8:32 PM  
Blogger honeykbee said...

Whoa, look at Paula Deen on that pork loin package! Does the winner of the kitchen makeover get a facefull of botox, too?

8:33 PM  
Blogger Brunch Bird said...

snicker snicker...;-)

9:57 PM  
Blogger Carrie M said...

email me, I'll send you the casserole recipe. It validates Paula Deen's existence.

1:33 AM  

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