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Thursday, January 18, 2007

They're Going to Make Me Turn in My Film Snob Card Over This One

But I don't care. I'm speaking to truth to power:

"One of the great end-of-childhood elegies." Salon.com

"It's pitch perfect, impeccably conceived...a masterpiece." Miami Herald

"Eh, not so much." Brunch Bird

Panting critics have been thumbing through their dictionaries to look up the spelling of supercalifragilisticexpialidoceous for this movie. Yet I was left with only one thought as I shuffled out of the Landmark last weekend: For a movie being hailed as the ne plus ultra of cinematic creativity, its gratuitous gore represents a complete failure of innovative filmmaking. It's like a gross, cranky Chocolat. Given critics' infatuation with the flimsy fairytale and the veritable stampede of film festivals to bestow top honors on it, I can only assume that we're going to see one heck of a Cannes and Oscar sweep next year by Saw IV. I don't mind violence in movies. I do mind pointless violence being flame broiled, wrapped up and put on the tray marked "groundbreaking" just because it's interspersed with scenes of a talking faun. Here's a tip: if you're reheating The Cell's themes and imagery, you're in trouble.

14 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

True or False:

Labyrinth (as directed by Jim Henson) > Pan's Labyrinth

1:50 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

lol@ I-66

and at least the cover art is cool lookin'

1:54 PM  
Blogger Brunch Bird said...

One's got Bowie in it, one doesn't. That's alls I'm sayin'.

2:16 PM  
Blogger KassyK said...

Really?! I am so upset bc this was my must see movie of 2007...I have to still go...all those amazing reveiws?! REALLY!? You are killing me. With sadness.

2:32 PM  
Blogger Brunch Bird said...

OK, I have to admit a personal bias: I'm not wild about movies that have odd fantastical creatures in them. Take Lord of the Rings--I dug the action, but not so much the talking trees and Orcs and such. I just get sort of creeped out by them. While that wasn't really what bothered me in this one (it was the general uck factor to which I alluded) maybe if I was into those types of movies I would have been bothered way less by the movie. And my S.O. thought it was good. So he probably brings a more unbiased perspective.

2:40 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

...she wouldn't have a problem with the trees in Lord of the Rings if the trees hadn't made fun of her constantly as a child.

2:49 PM  
Blogger Brunch Bird said...

Exactly. They were always hurling apples at me and my friends the Tin Man, the Scarecrow and the Lion.

2:50 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Is that why you don't go to work on Arbor Day?

3:13 PM  
Blogger Phil said...

talking deer?

Count me in.

7:21 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

If your S.O. liked it, that means a shitty ending for the main characters.

10:30 PM  
Blogger Brunch Bird said...

I-66- That's why I don't go to work most days.

Phil- There's a gigantic vomitting frog too, so that's good.

Libba- You know him too well my dear.

12:04 AM  
Blogger Heather B. said...

I knew someone I know had written about Pan's, but I couldn't remember who and it was you and you hated it! Awesome!

Saw it Friday...it was good but uh, interestingly violent to say the least. And I could do without a skinless man with crazy ass hand/eye coordination.

(yes, I said 'hand/eye' coordination. Color me lame)

1:08 PM  
Blogger Brunch Bird said...

Ohhhh I HATED that thing. I have this weird phobia about eyeballs, so I seriously wanted to yam during that entire scene. And I think the hand/eye joke is brill!

9:56 PM  
Blogger Arlene said...

OMG I only just found you blog and we are truly kindred spirits. I felt the exact same way, (although I don't actually have problems with fantastical creatures). I stopped reading the subtitles and laid on The Boy's shoulders. Luckily I didn't miss much.

10:01 PM  

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